Fragments of a Fractured Mind

Happy New Year!!


Welllllllllllllllll, dawgie! We got us a whole ‘nuther squeaky clean year to play with. All we have to do is….take a the first step into the unknown. I suppose that more than a few of us are making those….lists. They all begin with three words, up there at the top of the page.

“I resolve to……”

And I guess I have some things in mind, although I wouldn’t go so far as to define them with the ironclad label of resolutions. Let’s just say that mine is a collection of goals. I wanna reduce my circumference. I want to become more involved in my church, I wanna seek the face of God, to know Jesus better, things like that.

I am in the way of trying to build a new business, uh, well, the one I’ve talked of at some length on this blog. I was laid off end of last August and thereby my feet were set upon a path that I’ve trod before – this unemployment thing. But, you know, I’m not into being upset or depressed this time. Not at all.

Y’see, I received an email just four days before my former employer showed me the door. It was one of those “Send this to at least ten of your friends and something nice will happen to you in 48 hours” kinda things. Most times, I throw these things away and I have yet to suffer any harm or lost any treasure for having done so.

But this time, I decided to read the thing, because it was a spiritual message. Most of it slips my mind at the moment, but there was one sentence that stuck with me. It would pop into my consciousness just a few days later, as I left the premises of my former employer after having been discarded in the name of shrinking the payroll.

And what it said was this: “When God takes something from your grasp, it’s because He is trying to free up your hands so He can give something better to you.”

So I clung to that and it helped me get through those first days of unemployment, that and the proceeds from my 401-K. As time went by, I wondered more than a few times just what it is that God has in mind for me. It wasn’t until shortly before Thanksgiving that I began to get an inkling.

That was when I started to get some positive notice for my work from people who have the power to help me. A free-lance job came in and then another, more substantial one. And I made contact with a local concern which appears to have some interest in working with me. Will be chatting with them in a few days.

So I am looking at the growing possibility of doing something I’ve wanted to do for some years now – work for myself. I have grown weary of trying to please people who don’t really have my best interests in mind, and self-employment does offer certain, ah, securities.  I mean, it’s not likely that I will piss myself off badly enough to fire myself, now is it?

And this thing has God’s fingerprints all over it. That alone is enough to excite me.

So, off we go into the ephemeral mists of the future. I am all tingly about the prospects and possibilities this new year brings, and I’ve God’s strength and guidance on which to build something fresh and new. Maybe I’ll impress some of you. I might even impress myself. But, you know, if I manage to please God, well, then, that’ll be more than enough.

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